Love and laughter
"Gastrointestinal cancers are often deadly serious, but these are not deadly serious people," comments MacDonald. Group members usually look and feel good. Some turned to athletics to build strength. Kinchla and her family, for instance, joined the Relay for Life, a walking/running event that benefits the American Cancer Society, while Wong, a self-proclaimed ex-couch potato, completed a triathlon "sprint" (half-mile swim, 12-mile bike ride, and 3-mile run). Experiencing the elation of a swim, bike ride, or road race helps some patients push forward.
"My overall goal is to help people focus on living, and not be defined by their disease or treatment."
— Bruce MacDonald, LICSW
As with any gathering of middle-aged people, the conversation often turns to their children, and it's clear that a group of young adults are ready to step forward when needed. Wong and Lee talk willingly about cancer, but it's obvious that their daughters, an engineer and a composer, are a preferred topic. Kinchla says her children have been very attentive, and she cherishes her memories of last spring's trip to Italy and Croatia with her two youngest, both in their 20s.
Group members are also grateful for the love and support of friends. "One thing that has awed me during this whole process is how many people reach out," says Kinchla. "We have all discovered the genuine goodness and caring of people around us every day."
There is often laughter in the room when the group meets. "We're free of smaller worries," Kinchla notes. "For example, so what if I shorten my life by a day if I eat a doughnut? Some of us joke that we won't have to worry about Alzheimer's disease.
"Sometimes we forget we have cancer," she points out. "When Bruce asks us why we keep coming, we answer, 'Because we like each other.'"
