Martha Hayward
A sister's gift leads to breast cancer education
Leslie and Martha Hayward
When my sister, Leslie, was diagnosed with breast cancer in January 2006, I realized I had not had a mammogram myself in nearly two years. Just as she reached the halfway point in her 16 weeks of chemotherapy, I had to tell her that I had breast cancer, too.
I will never forget making that phone call.
She was more upset about my diagnosis than her own. We couldn't believe this was happening to us at the same time. I was 48, she was 50, we had no family history of cancer, and we were in excellent health.
Leslie paved the way for me. When I received my diagnosis, she had already taught me about various types of breast cancer. I knew the difference between a PET scan and an MRI, and understood the spectrum of treatments I would have to choose from.
As we moved ahead, we found comfort in each other. Our education as cancer patients was easier because we could compare notes and share the tricks we learned along the way, such as what to eat, how to sleep, what the aches and pains meant, what to wear, and how to be comfortable during a PET scan. In my very worst moments I never felt alone.
My dream is that every cancer patient will experience the same kind of education and support. In the two years since my double mastectomy, I have thought about ways to encourage women to be diligent in examining their breasts, and to be assured they are not alone. I came up with an idea that I hope will make a difference.
Beads symbolize early detection and recovery
Wanting to educate women about the importance of early detection and the stages of recovery, I developed two separate bead designs: recovery beads and remember beads.
One of my hardest moments after surgery was when my nurse told me I could get dressed and go home. Like all breast surgery patients, I had four tubes for draining coming out of my incisions. I could not figure out how to get dressed. My daughter had the great idea for me to wear a long, chunky, pearl necklace that I had brought with me to the hospital. So, I clipped the tubes to the necklace, and when my surgeon saw me, he said this was the classiest, most creative solution he had seen.
You might ask why I brought the necklace to the hospital. Well, I had two friends facing mastectomies around the same time as mine. When I saw the necklaces in a shop, I bought one for each of us as a symbol of solidarity.
Recovery Beads
I wore mine for days after I got home, and came up with the idea for "Recovery beads." Strung on a 45-inch, necklace-length ribbon, these beads can be worn by patients during their early weeks of recovery from surgery, until their drains are removed. In addition to being a useful post-op tool, the beads offer a concrete way for patients to share information about their own cancer, and convey the message that early detection is key to survival.
One day I used them to explain to a friend what size tumor I had. That was the moment "Remember beads" were born. Strung on an 18-inch, brightly-colored ribbon, remember beads are decorative and can be hung on a car mirror, door knob, or just about anywhere. I brought them with me to all my appointments, and they served as worry beads while I was waiting.
Both sets feature four pearls strung in increasing size to represent a simple and tactile way of increasing awareness and educating women about the importance of breast self-examination and annual mammograms. The smallest bead is the approximate size of tumor a mammogram can detect, the second what your doctor may feel during a clinical exam, the third is what you might find during a self-exam, and the largest is the size of an undetected tumor.
In addition to using remember beads, we can encourage our friends, daughters, mothers, and friends to talk openly about their illness, call for regular appointments, and help educate other woman around the world about what they can do to conquer cancer.
My sister's reminder to get a mammogram saved my life. It is the gift every breast cancer survivor can give others. Each of us is a living reminder that early detection really does make a difference.
For more information on recovery and remember beads, please visit: www.rememberbeads.com.
